Satire Alert: For those who are humor impared, this is a satire of the silly anti-Obama websites put up by so-called Hillary supporters who soldier on, despite failing to stop Obama. The sites being satired: Hillbuzz, The Confluence, Noquarter and Texas Darling. I am, for the record, an Obama supporter. Start satire now:
Well, it had to happen, didn’t it. For Barack Obama, it wasn’t enough to steal the election from first Hillary Clinton and then John McCain, now he has the unmitigated gall to foist the most shameful humiliation onto Hillary Clinton. He must delight in demeaning women and sticking a fork into Hillary Clinton, despite the fact his minions like Howard Dean and Donna Brazile forced her to pretend to support him during the election campaign. Now President Elect Barry Sorterobama wants the most distinguished Senator and should-be President Elect to become nothing but a mere Secretary. Kicked in the shins so often by the party that they built from the ashes left by Obama’s intellectual mentor, Jimmy Carter, the Clintons seem willing to consider it.
Yes, word is that Hillary Clinton is being considered for the position of Secretary of state. Can you believe it! Clearly, Obama knows that his path to power is not complete. There are law suits pending, proving that he was born in either Kenya, Indonesia, or that he renounced his citizenship and thus is not a legal American citizen. That means that there are three other possibilities than his having been born in Hawaii as he claims. That’s a one in four chance, only a 25% probability he’s a native born citizen. That alone should get him disqualified. Perhaps he knows that secret paperwork from Kenya is on its way, and he wants Hillary out of the way.
The electoral college has also not spoken. What will happen when the video that the Obama campaign has paid Fox news millions of dollars not to release — the one showing Michelle Obama screaming “death to f***ing Whitie!” while wearing a T-shirt of Adolf Hitler in black face with the caption “we need one of these!” — finally gets released? Will the electors still vote for this Muslim who worships in a racist Christian church?
Or, perhaps, he simply wants to prove to Hillary that he is dominant, and she is nothing but a Secretary. Instead of chugging down Crowne Royal with the unemployed steelworkers of Bethlehem, Pennsylvania, she’ll have to sip fine wine with French President Sarkozy and his model wife. Yup. Hillary will be forced to hobnob with women who defy her spunk and energy and instead simply want to be beautiful and snag a powerful husband. Instead of beer in Columbus, it’ll be tea with the pinky extended with the Queen in Buckingham palace? Can you think of anything more demeaning?
Recently an insightful Georgia Congressman compared Obama to Hitler. Hitler should be the one feeling insulted. Hitler was a courageous courrier in World War I, a job with 80% mortality rates. He was an artist, a soldier and he suffered in prison for his political views. If you doubt Obama is worse than Hitler, can you see Hitler embracing the teachings of Reverend Wright? Obama, on the other hand, is an empty suit. Moreover, he’s an obviously evil empty suit because he’s managed to fake accomplishments like graduating from Harvard Law school, serving as the first Black Harvard Law Review chief editor, working in community action, serving in the Illinois Senate and then moving on to the United States Senate. All these “accomplishments”, as well as his campaign and debates have fooled Americans into not recognizing he’s just an empty suit. Clearly, the media has been in on the scam from day one.
Why? Well, it’s clear Obama is a Marxist. He had classes with Marxist professors in college, and we know how hard you have to look to find a Marxist in academia! He never came clean on his relationship with William Ayres, including the allegations that they have had a homosexual love affair for years, including a sado-masochistic ritual with the safe words “bomb the Pentagon!” Clearly, this is a man bent on destroying America.
But most import to us Hillary Clinton supporters, he wants to destroy the one savior who could unite the country and bring us to a new paradise. Instead of the gritty and determined heroine, we get this guy who people treat as the messiah, “the One,” adoring him and looking over obvious hypocrisies. Hillary is honest and forthright. Yeah, she told us she supported Obama and she campaigned for him, but that was because Howard Dean and Donna Brazile threatened her, and her loyalty to the Democratic party — a trait that shows strength — meant she felt she had to support a man she knows isn’t up for the job. What a woman she is! Can we have Hillary back, PLEASE?
I’m sure Obama is a decent father, his kids seem to like him, and I’m not saying he is himself fundamentally evil. But we don’t know him. We do know that he went to a racist church, likely muttering “Amen” to Rev. Wright’s continual calls to God to damn America. Clearly he was raised on ‘black liberation theology,’ an obscure sixties movement that Rev. Wright was part of. Since he went to the same church, he clearly holds all the views of that movement, from Marxism to anti-white racism. To deny that would be irrational; the fact the media didn’t point this out shows they hate America so much they’d rather have a ‘big story’ then a good President.
And his clear sexism in wanting to make Hillary a Secretary should send up warning signals to women everywhere. The way the Democrats and the media savaged Sarah Palin, that brilliant strong woman who gave us hope after Hillary was denied her destiny by the media-DNC partnership, shows that the elites in journalism and the Democratic party hate women. What other explanation can there be?
Moreover, if Obama hadn’t bussed in tens of thousands of ACORN volunteers to Iowa, Hillary would have won those caucuses and gone on to vicotry. And all the close states — the margins of a few hundred thousand voters easily could have been ACORN fraud. Could have been? Anyone who doubts it has obviously been sipping the koolaid, believing the preposterous claim Obama won fair and square. When people start falling for outlandish things like Obama as a legitimate President, you know they’ve slipped off the deep end.
My friends (and we know that’s the proper way to address a collective mass, most of whom we know nothing about), Hillary Clinton should stand up and say what she really thinks about Barack Obama. She should fight back against the abuse and say “I ain’t gonna be no Secretary!” Because you know, if she accepts, the President of Ecador or somewhere will be visiting, and Barry will ring up the Old Executive Office building and say to Hillary, “Sweetie, I’m meeting with a foreign leader and I think you should be here…could you bake up some of those delicious oatmeal scotchies and bring them over too?…thanks.”
Only those completely out of touch with reality could possibly hold such bizarre views as those being shown in the mainstream media, the world press, public opinion, and especially on college campuses (those young snots don’t know what experience means, after all). We see clearly the truth, that Obama is a false messiah, and Hillary needs to be raised from the dead! Fight on!
(End of Satire)